He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
