we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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