What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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