i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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