Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
