ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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