Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
