imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
