TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
