I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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