I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
