we have officially lost it.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
