everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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