She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
it's great music for shaving your balls
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
