I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
he fucked my hip out of place.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
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Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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