is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize