anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize