Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I need water and some morals
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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