Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
We're too hungover to prance.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize