Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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