proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
