Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
