So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
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He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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