you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
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shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
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Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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