no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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