you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
