why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
