do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize