HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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