You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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