Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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