Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
