Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
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