Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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