Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
