Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
There's always time for handjobs
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
