The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
