I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked