My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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