haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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