you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I touched a dick in church today
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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