1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize