Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
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Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
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She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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