it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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