have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
