i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
