i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
