Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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