Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
