need another drink. this is the easiest way
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
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