and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
if you like me you must not know who I am
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
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He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
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Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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